MY ONLY FRIEND
The tears are flooding down across my face,
Why is life so empty and cruel?
Today is 13th birthday, but all I can think about is those evil bullies from school.
I try to dry my eyes as my Mum walks into my room, bringing me breakfast in bed;
She sings me happy birthday, before softly kissing my forehead.
On the outside I try to smile, but on the inside I am screaming for her help, but she hasn’t got a clue;
I try to somehow find the courage to tell her, but instead my lips just tremble out “Mum….I love you”.
She blows me a kiss before walking away, shouting back for me to hurry as school starts in an hour and I don’t want to be late;
My waiting tears start to once again fall, as I am trapped living in this inescapable fate.
Dear diary, please help me, you are my only friend but these pages never send me a reply;
The bullies said yesterday if I ever come back to school then I was going to die.
Fat face, smelly clothes, they call me dirty just because of the colour of my skin;
I guess they are right, they are all so pretty with blonde hair, nice clothes, really popular and thin.
They always trip me over in the school yard, everybody laughs, and nobody cares when they see me cry;
Each night I sit weeping these tears of ink into my diary, asking the same question, why?
I stand staring at my ugly reflection as I get changed, my Mum shouting from downstairs that I only have 5 minutes before we leave;
The walls around me start to cave in, and my palms begin to sweat as I struggle to even breathe.
I swallow the lump in my throat, wipe my eyes and prepare myself for the day;
My lips tremble out “okay Mum, 2 seconds and we will be on our way”.
The whole journey to school I keep trying to tell my Mum the truth, but she is so happy, talking about parties and how all of my family are coming over later for my birthday tea;
Why can’t she just look into my eyes, they are screaming out for her to help me.
We pull up to the school gates, my Mum kisses my cheek whilst saying “I love you baby”, I have to bite my lip so that I do not cry;
I open the car door as I whisper back “goodbye”.
My Mum pulls away as I see the bullies standing in the school yard, staring across the road at me standing crying in the rain;
I turn and run sprinting blindly across roads, through parks until my tired legs give way to the pain.
I turn and look back, nobody is there I am all alone, my tears are overwhelming my face now and all I want to do is die;
I take off my scarf as I look towards the heavens, I wish my Mummy was here so that I could explain and say a better goodbye.
I tie one end of my scarf to the lowest branch, and I make a tight noose at the other end;
I place this letter at the base of the tree, and as my lips turn a dark shade of blue I whisper out goodbye to my only friend.
BARRY MOWLES ©
DESTINY TO WRITE PUBLICATIONS ©